THE NEW EWE

"What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he loses one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness, and go after the one which is lost, until he finds it? And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost!'"

Luke 15:4-6

March 15, 2023

LIFE IN THE FOLD

Several years ago, when I was single and lived in the country, I decided for the 999^th time (may be a bit of an exaggeration) that I needed to start exercising. My position at the bank,where I worked, required me to spend most of my day sitting at a desk. So I decided that every afternoon when I got home from work, I would take a walk. I lived down a dirt road, so began by walking from my house to the end of the road and back; which wasn't that far, but a good start to getting exercise.

Shortly after I began walking, a neighbor man was out in his yard and hollered at me, "Hey, you need to be running! You're not going to get into shape as slow as you're walking. If you want to lose weight, you're going to have to move faster than that!" I was walking as fast as I could, and had been proud of myself for making the effort each evening. The man stood there watching me walk and laughing, and I felt embarrassed and ridiculed. I think it was the tone that he used when talking to me. He tended to have a bit of a smart-aleck sense of humor. I knew that, but it still embarrassed me.

My response was to stop walking in the evenings. I didn't want to give him the opportunity to laugh at me again. I don't why I let his words bother me, because he didn't walk or exercise himself. Granted, he wasn't overweight and looked to be in shape. But it's easy to feel offended or hurt over words that someone speaks that seem critical; although they aren't doing the very thing that they are criticizing you for.

Fast forward a few years later. I once again had started another walking program.... for the 1321^st time (again, exaggerating somewhat!). I mentioned it to someone who was athletic, in shape, and exercised regularly. Their response was, "High five! That's awesome!! I'm proud of you!" Their words were an encouragement and made me want to continue walking. Granted, I'm a warm weather walker and tend to stop (then have a hard time getting started back) when the weather is cooler or it's rainy or nasty out. I, also, don't have a good place by my house to walk.... I know: excuses!

My point is, the words spoken to me both times had an impact on me. The words spoken by the first person made me want to quit. The second person spoke words that were encouraging and made me feel good about myself.

Often we allow the words spoken to us, by others, to impact our choices. I couldn't control what either person said to me, but I did have a choice in how I responded.

Words can hurt feelings, cause embarrassment, build up, encourage, and cause many different emotions. We all understand that. We can't dictate what someone says to us or about us; that is completely out of our control. But what we often forget is that we are in charge of how we respond and how we allow those words to affect us.

In Matthew we read where one day Peter went up to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?" Peter probably thought that forgiving someone seven times would be pretty generous!

Jesus' answer likely surprised Peter! "No, not seven times," (Peter may have thought, "Whew! Maybe He's just going to say that I have to forgive them 1-2 times!").... but Jesus continued saying, "But [forgive] seventy times seven!"

Honestly, there have been too many times when someone has said something hurtful or negative to me or about me and I will remember it and hold onto it for years. Is that really forgiveness, when I remember their words and bring it up over and over again? Perhaps they don't even realize that their words hurt my feelings or upset me, so they've forgotten all about it and have no idea that I've held onto what they said. They may never ask for forgiveness, because they don't know that there is a need to do so; or perhaps they have, but we still hold onto that hurt.

Our responsibility is to forgive -- and let it go! I don't always do so well at that!! I have had to pray about this over and over again.

First of all, I've had to pray that my words will not hurt someone and cause them to be pained or upset or embarrassed. I know that I have said unkind things that I should never had said. I've acted selfishly, not considering someone else's feelings at times. Honestly, many of those times, I was not even aware that what I was saying or doing was causing hurt. I don't want to be like that! I want to be more aware of the impact that my words have on others.

Secondly, I've had to pray that I could let go of the hurt or embarrassment that were caused by what someone said to me. Likely, just like I've been throughout the years, they were oblivious that their words were etched into my memory and I continued bringing them up over and over in my mind. I want to learn to forgive quickly, and not hold onto things -- even when I feel like the other person isn't sorry. My choice to forgive will have an affect on my peace of mind and joy; as well as on my attitude.

I want to be an encourager and a help and be positive; not critical or judgmental or hurtful. I want my words to build up and bless; not tear down and cause pain. I want my life to exude joy and peace and it will only do so if I choose to live in a continual state of love and forgiveness.

I'm still a work in progress!! I see and know my faults, and understand my shortcomings. Sometimes I say something and immediately think, "Why did you say that?!" I criticize when I should be praying and building up. I know that I cannot change myself on my own, but can only be changed by allowing God to work in my life. I can't be thinking, "I'm not the problem -- it's (whoever)!" I have to examine myself and allow God to show me the areas that need improved and changed; then allow Him to do the work inside me. I have to yield myself to Him and surrender my thoughts and words and selfishness and all that junk inside to the Father. Only then will I see change and improvement and become more and more like Jesus.

JON'S PERSPECTIVE:

We had someone in our extended family for around a year who was very good at non-apologies. I don't know if she ever truly felt sorry for anything she did or said. But when she was confronted, she would say things like "I'm sorry you feel that way", "I'm sorry you heard that", or "I'm sorry you think I wasn't being nice", or whatever.

In short, if anyone says "I'm sorry you...", there is almost no way they are apologizing for what they did or said. They are apologizing for what the other person did, thought, felt, or caught. True apologies should always start, "I'm sorry I...".

Forgiveness can be difficult to give. Or it can be easy. If you want someone to forgive you, make it easy on them, and apologize for real. If you are having a hard time forgiving someone else, ask for an apology. They may surprise you and apologize for real.

ON THE MENEWE:

Quick and Easy Cookies

Choose whatever flavor of cake mix you desire. Mix the cake mix, 2 eggs and 1/2 cup of oil together; stir well.

You can add in chocolate chips, nuts, etc. if desired.

Bake at 350 for 10 minutes.

THIS, THAT AND THE OTHER:

Can I just say how proud I am of my husband?! He works hard and knows how to fix many things and does excellent work. Last June he began building a new 13x30 shed for our backyard. He has done the work by himself and has spent the last nine months working evenings and weekends on it. It has been a long labor of love! He has done excellent work and finally sees an end in sight. Yay!! It is a beautiful building and we are very proud of it.

Earlier this week, with the colder weather, I realized that the house was feeling cold inside and our furnace wasn't kicking on. I mentioned it to Jon and he checked the downstairs furnace and the ignitor wasn't working. Thankfully, we had a new one on hand and he was able to replace it and get it going again. He's a good, good man and I'm honored that God chose him to be my husband!

THOUGHT TO PONDER:

Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair.

It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere. - English proverb

OUR HEARTFELT THANKS TO YOU:

We love you!

Loretta & Jon

http://www.graysheep.org